Today, I cannot figure out what is on my mind. Everything, and nothing, I suppose.
Millions of thoughts – happy or sad? I’m not sure. Perhaps a combination of both.
The weather has been so perfect. Rain, and cloud-covered grey skies. I’ve been too busy to enjoy it to its fullest, until today.
And now that I am sitting by a huge window, in my pj’s and under a blanket, having finished a beautifully made hot cup of Sri Lankan tea, my mind has taken the liberty of leading the happenings of the day.
One problem, though; I have no idea where it has led me. I feel childlike content at one moment, and then deep affliction. My mind is starting to feel like a dark alleyway that I don’t fancy walking down.
I suppose what is left – and is above babbling about it – is to hand it over to God.
“Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.” – Psalms 23:4
I was going to name this blog “Diary of a wannabe,” but that was already taken.
Like most people, I ‘wannabe’ someone. Not just in theory – I really want to be someone who other someone’s look at and proudly point, “I know her.”
Prideful desire? Maybe.
I have a personality that can cater for almost any type of person – although I sometimes scare introverts when I forget to use my inside voice (that was pointed out to me a few times today).
Somehow, writing (and taking photographs – this is very important) helps me get into a zone that caters for me. I spend a lot of time thinking – I digest more brainwaves than I do food (and that says a lot as the amount of food I eat has caused many a jaw to drop) – so I need a place to jot down my over-analytical, often full-of-nonsense, but mostly God-seeking thoughts…and this is it.
If you so happen to find this blog, pray for me. I will be doing the same for you. I want to be someone, and here I can be exactly who I am when I am that. 🙂